This Is What Makes Us Girls
by ReturntoZero1
Summary: Fairytales? Yeah, i-it's because I just want a happy ending, just like the people in the fairytales. Warnings: Yuri Genderbend! Humanstuck! Angst...


Title: This is what makes us girls

Pairings: PB&J

Warnings: Genderbent! Humanstuck.

_**A/N: **_When you see [*] play this song-http: /www. Youtube. Com /watch?v=IIrB6y7j05s

-Love-

She could only cry as she looked up at the stars.

Her make-up had been smeared off, and she really didn't feel like lighting up a joint. Soon she held her head in her hands, cradling the endless typhoon of thoughts, trying so hard to stifle the tears that welled up in her violet eyes.

She missed her best friend.

Each broken shard of her heart got caught in her throat, making all sorts of painful lacerations in her esophagus, only leaving a hollow feeling in it's wake. Every moment without her sunshine would be painfully dark, and she felt so hopeless without her guiding light, loneliness creeping up and rolling down her back in long waves. Why was it so wrong-why had she left-why did the birds sing as she was hurting-why?

_**Dyke.**_

Gamzee felt her tears finally spill over, warmth leaving lovely glistening trails from her dark colored orbs.

All she wanted was love.

Again she could only taste bitter rejection as she thought of the word, and her mind quickly connected her best friend, her brother lady, her sunshine, to the idea of love. Old memories resurfaced, and their colors fading too quickly, all the happiness leaving with them, even as she tried to keep her mind on them she could only remember the horrified look on Tavrus's face.

That was the last time Gamzee saw her sunshine.

Ever since she had been aware of Tavrus's hiding, she almost wanted to scream, she hadn't killed anyone.

The brunette sighed, more weight pushing down on her tired body and she fell back, tears blurring the night sky, making the stars look more like puncture wounds. She let out a pained sob, her voice hurting as she let out her anguish, it felt like she was dying.

She found herself in the beginning again, her heart settling a bit as she recalled the first time she had met Tavrus.

The poor girl was such a shy pretty thing, Gamzee always thought she was pretty, and she had been harassed by all the hungry boys. What started out as flirting ended up as screaming, she became a nervous wreck around and freaked out at their advances. They weren't just talking, they couldn't keep their greedy paws off the lovely new girl, and Gamzee wouldn't let her become a victim.

She soon examined her shiny purple nails, the Capricorn was glad that she hadn't broken a nail bashing the guy's face in.

The mohawked girl had calmed down, her lovely chocolate doe eyes staring at her savior, and soon a small smile bloomed on her lips. Gamzee felt like a motherfucking hero, "Sup." She felt something flutter, but only brushed it away, instead holding a thin palm towards the new girl.

Ever since that day Tavrus had stuck to Gamzee, they were inseparable.

The pair had become best friends, each day flying by, their giggles could be heard from down the hall, and somehow they had made a whole world of their own. They were having too much fun, going to every party they could, but never mingling with the other teens. Of course they said hello and conversed briefly, but soon they would run off, on some adventure, trying to taste the world together.

Everything seemed perfect, but their paradise ended when Vriska showed up.

Despite the feminine name, the boy had tried his hardest to be a man, took every opportunity to show his dominance, ripping through girls like tissue paper. Gamzee had tried her hardest to protect her friend, vowing to never let Tavrus get near a guy like Vriska.

Gamzee had loved all the spa treatments and sleepovers they had, they even had sick rap battles that always ended in fits of laughter. Soon Tavrus began to leave on her own, drifting away from the robust Capricorn. The nights spent watching movies and doing make-overs always were too short, but now Gamzee hated how long the eerie nights felt. It was on a stupidly long night that she had discovered weed, and she loved how time just got fucked up, and the colors would keep her company.

The more Tavrus left, the more Gamzee smoked.

Soon Tavrus was always gone, and Gamzee felt alone again. Before their encounter she had always floated around, migrating from group to group, but she had never felt...wanted. They never made her leave, but they wouldn't even notice when she left, no one was distressed by his absence. Tavrus had always clung to her, rich creamy chocolate always searching for the brunette. The way the shy girl's eyes would light up at Gamzee's arrival was brighter than the sun, more gorgeous than any sunset could compare to.

Again Gamzee was surprised by the girl's sweet nature, and couldn't help but gain a sweet tooth from it.

It was when Gamzee found that Tavrus liked fairytales, she couldn't help but wonder why she would like something so...childish? She quickly inquired, honestly intrigued and eagerly awaited the response.

_Fairytales? Yeah, i-it's because I just want a happy ending, just like the people in the fairytales._

Gamzee let out a bitter laugh, the hollow noise only echoing in her own head, the girl was too lovely.

_H-hey Gam, I uhh think your hair is getting long! _

She absently tangled her fingers in her long black hair, noticing how long it had gotten again, it defiantly went way past her shoulders.

_B-But that's not bad, your hair is always so p-pretty..._

Gamzee had always thought Tavrus was so pretty, the prettiest girl in school actually. One time in a weed-induced high she had said so many things, her brain barely registering any of the words she was even saying, "Tavvy, I love you."

_I love you too Gam, you're my bestest friend ever._

Tavrus only continued to slip through Gamzee's fingers, she didn't even color them anymore, but never bothered to trim her nails either.

It wasn't until much later that Gamzee had seen the couple participating sloppy make-outs, completely stunned at the reason why Tavrus was leaving so much.

Their chats had quickly escalated into fights, both girls screaming at one another.

_Vriska isn't as bad as you say he is._

Gamzee was angry, Tavrus was too innocent for her own good.

_He loves me._

The Capricorn was not going to let some horrible slime like Vriska get such a lovely angel like Tavrus.

_I hate you._

It was those three words that hurt the most, ripping through Gamzee like a lance, killing all her anger and leaving behind sheer pain. She stayed silent, and Tavrus huffed away, easily throwing her away for Vriska.

Gamzee couldn't stop smoking.

She didn't even care anymore, going as far as to sell her television for money to use on stronger weed, the words still ringing in her head, she became deaf to everything else. All she knew was that she had to get more weed, hoping that maybe this batch would be strong enough to make the pain go away.

Tavros had appeared again, puffy eyed and shaking, sputtering empty words.

It nearly shattered her heart, seeing her favorite girl so sad, instantly scooping the shorter brunette into a tight embrace. Gamzee patted the soft fluff of her friend's mohawk, instead rocking and trying to create a steady rhythm.

_I'm sorry-I-I oh I hate him._

More tears came, and her weak attack only brought a sad smile to Gamzee's face. She was lying through her teeth, but instead she began to place light kisses on Tavrus's forehead. Gamzee began to cry as well, she was hurting because Tavrus was hurting, "Don't cry about him."

Soon Tavrus returned to Gamzee's side, this time going as far as to clutch her hand tightly whenever they walked.

The Capricorn had felt peace once again, but still disappointed at herself for letting Tavrus feel pain. With the Taurus' return, Gamzee felt the sunshine again, a light blooming in her heart. She reached for a joint, only to be held back by lovely tan fingers. Tavrus made a face, prying her away from her addiction, but Gamzee couldn't stop. The pain had never stopped, despite having Tavrus back again, the words still echoed loudly in her skull.

Their relationship had mended again, Gamzee had a bit of a smoking problem, but she was working on that.

Tavrus still sometimes fell into a slump about love, her heart still yearning for that disgusting boy, but Gamzee would always stay close, pushing her back onto her feet. Finally Tavrus' depression hit an all time low, and dragged on for a week. She would try her best to smile but it would never reach her eyes. She had lost the glimmer in her eyes, the Capricorn was brought down as well. The long haired brunette thought and thought, finally conjuring up a plan to bring a smile to Tavrus' face.

Again they met for the usual sleepover, but this time Gamzee was going to sing to Tavrus. It had been a long time since she had sung to anyone, she used to whip out melodies as a child, but she stopped after her mother left. Daddy would never love again after that, instead choosing to leave his little girl in the house without any warning. Gamzee had tried to sing, but her voice echoing in the large home only reminded her of how alone she was.

Nerves flared and Gamzee put on a smile, she had to at least try.

[*]

She pushed her friend on the couch, and popped in the CD, waiting for her cue to begin. Tavrus watched curiously, she had only been ordered to stay put and watch. Soon Gamzee took in a deep breath and started, her voice smoothing over every note with thick honey. Even as she moved to higher octaves, she kept her voice soft, and something bloomed more, she locked eyes with lovely chocolate pools and felt the strength to continue.

Soon emotions began to spill over into the notes, and everything at the moment felt like a motherfucking miracle.

The Capricorn couldn't stop, pushing her vocal cords to their fullest strength, wanting to feel like everything was alright, to find that peace again, to be able to see Tavrus' smile again. Memories pelted her mind, every good and bad moment playing again, the pain, the happiness, it was all worth it. If she had known that Tavrus would come back and stay by her side she would gladly go through it all again, her heart beat harder, strong and ready to fight.

Finally she began to ponder on the small moments, the quiet moments, and her heart fluttered, it was those moments when Tavrus was so beautiful. Gamzee couldn't even fathom being without her friend, and she would do anything for that smile, even if it meant letting go of her. If she was happier with another person then Gamzee wouldn't stop her. She would give Tavrus the key to heaven, even if it meant she had to wait outside of it's gates with only the chance to look in.

Gamzee began to cry, she was just so happy with Tavrus.

Tavrus began to tear up as well, but a smile graced her rosy pink lips, the upward curl of her mouth finally bringing so much light back into her thick brown eyes. The song faded out, and the girls embraced, Gamzee felt her heart swell, and everything was perfect. The song was perfect, every apology and promise unspoken but clearly stated, creating a miracle between the pair.

Unfortunately it was the beginning of the end.

As soon they had found their peace again, Vriska reared his ugly head around, ready to mess with the duo.

He tormented the shy girl, not afraid to hit her and push her around, but Gamzee had always snarled back, throwing a few punches back, no one would mess with Tavrus. They fought, and all the Capricorn could see was red, wanting to rip that motherfucking shit-eating grin off of Vriska's face. Tavrus begged her to stop, but it wasn't until they were on the ground did she stop.

Everything began to crumble, and Gamzee sputtered out, "I love you Tavrus."

Tavrus was going to reply but they locked eyes and everything was finally understood. She stared, shock settling into her features, soon she got up, running away from everyone, leaving Gamzee a broken mess of flesh and tears in the hallway.

Gamzee had desperately tried, she wanted to explain that friendship would be enough-

_P-Please just leave me alone Gamzee..._

The pain stabbed right through her chest, a constant burning that seared her heart, making her wish it would just go away. The stars defiantly looked like puncture wounds, and the pain was just shining through the darkness, cutting every happy feeling that arose. It was the pain that stood out, not the blank peace.

The tears never seemed to stop, her head throbbed painfully, it was too much.

Gamzee had found out about the names they called Tavrus, and felt completely guilty, it was because she was a motherfucking dyke that Tavrus was being picked on. She had locked eyes with her old friend for a moment, and the pain and sadness flashed for a moment, but was quickly hidden under a dark blank shade of brown, the shield had been put up.

There was no light in her eyes.

Gamzee clawed at her own eyelids, wishing she could just stop motherfucking crying.

Soon the flood of tears paused for a moment, but her turmoil remained, agony ripping at her throat. Soon she sat up and saw Tavrus standing a few feet away, a serious look etched on her features. Her voice cracked as she called out to Tavrus, "How long have you been there?" She swallowed heavy, her long dry throat pulsing with regret.

_I-I-Gam... I am sorry._

The apology didn't help and the long haired brunette ran her hand through wavy locks. Soon the other girl sat directly in front, the same look plastered onto her face. She made eye contact and Gamzee couldn't rip her eyes away, and simply allowed Tavrus to look. She waited and waited, the silence between them stretched endlessly.

Finally the other girl spoke, her meek voice penetrating the silence-

_I just want you to be h-happy. And ummm...I think we s-should uhhhm, f-ff-find h-heaven t-together..._

Tavrus burst into tears as she confessed her idea, hugging Gamzee and clutching onto her. She sobbed loudly, burying her head into a warm chest, and soon Gamzee reacted, hand resting atop her fluffy mohawk and petting her. She began to hum, and the tears faded from her lovely chocolate eyes. Gamzee gave one last look, her eyes sharp and demanding, trying to get confirmation from the smaller girl.

She spoke again, _I love you Gam._

It was almost surreal, and Gamzee was speechless as the shy girl stole a kiss from her chapped lips, sweet with the softest pressure applied in all the right places. They continued to make-out, their kisses becoming sickeningly sweet, and Gamzee felt his heart sigh. The anguish slowly faded, and she continued to heal her wounds with more kisses and loving looks, soon they were too busy to even notice the new dawn approaching.

The darkness faded from the sky, the lightest bright blue sky rolling from it's dark blanket and covered the world with it's joy. Gamzee finally smiled, lacing her fingers with her new lover, infatuated with the blush that stained the tanned girl's face.

The smile that came from Tavrus's face was different, and somehow Gamzee felt special, completely addicted to the girl beside her.

Gamzee leaned down, her pale pink lips brushing against Tavrus' ear, "I'll make sure you get you motherfucking happy ending, because you are the best miracle to grace this world."

_**A/N: Thanks again for reading and I hope you enjoyed this piece as much as I did. Comments are love!~3**_


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